FIC: Stupid Question (5/?) (TV-MA) and notes

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Today on Free for All I post two items.

First comes more of Stupid Question, a story started on my posting day. Old chapters are here or on seasonal_spuffy  on my April 5th posting date. I expect nine chapters all together and promise weekly new chapters until the story is done if you want to follow on my LJ.

Second will come a new story called Stupid Vampire. People seemed to like Stupid Thing from my posting day and this is a followup, but the two stories are independent and can be read in either order without prejudice. One part of Stupid Vampire may be angsty for Krevlorneswath fans.

Disclaimer: ME, Fox, and Joss. Yours!

Feedback: craved

Stupid Question

Stupid Question is a fill in the blanks story focusing on a character from The Girl In Question who gets only a few seconds of screen time. Extensive research and careful plotting has been done to produce the absolutely most canon and most likely account of events from this other point of view.

Part five finds us back in the Trastevere at a dance club where folks from out of town seem to think they are going bowling. Note that this chapter may include amorous activities between Spike or Buffy and another character. Or it may not. It’s really a matter of whom you ask.

I’ve never written any smut before so please comment but be gentle.


From home it’s only a ten minute walk to the club. She has to go through the Aurelian wall on the way which always gives her a giggle. From what Spike told her one night on patrol it’s only the Master and Darla who obsessed over all the clan mumbo jumbo. And they’ve both been dead for seven years.

But two Aurelians changed her life forever. Three if you count the Master. And even if it is a different Aurelius she likes passing through the wall every day. Sometimes she stops and touches the warm stone.

But not this time. She’s already late and the top speed on the teal vespa is too slow for her. The Immortal really doesn’t like to be stood up. And she can’t exactly explain about her little detour to Wolfram e Hart.

She parks the little scooter right at the foot of the steps and runs inside on two inch heels. The vespa probably doesn’t need to be locked up in a public spot like this.

Inside the Immortal has already attracted a crowd of female admirers. One with two-tone hair and an off the shoulders top is getting far too cozy with Buffy’s date. So Buffy bumps the girl out of the way with a swing of her hips and thanks her sarcastically for looking after him.

Not that Buffy has any worries. Usually after a month the Immortal moves on to a new girl. That’s probably why the crowd here tonight is at least three to one female. Girls on the hunt for the most popular boyfriend in Rome. But Buffy knows something little miss two-tone doesn’t.

Slayer kegels.

Faith taught her the line, but it was perfect to pick up the Immortal; caught his attention and got her a date on their first meeting. All she had to do was sweetly threaten to squeeze him until he popped like warm champagne.

“My princess, I was beginning to miss your delightful smile and your deep green eyes. Come dance with me.”

Since then he has bought Buffy enough of the world’s finest champagne to make a down payment on a house. And it has never been served warm.

Buffy turns around and starts grinding her hips into the Immortal’s pants as she faces away from him. Her head twists back and forth and all the hair she has grown out since Sunnydale wraps around her like a curtain. It’s a perfect moment. A perfect moment to pretend that she’s right here with Spike and they’re together again and this toy boyfriend is the vampire of her dreams. She lets that warm tingle between her legs start to get carried away. Even her vampire sense is starting to tingle like it would for Spike.

She never wants this moment to end.

As she rubs her butt in the tiny little dress against the Immortal’s pants again she can tell she isn’t the only one getting carried away.

And then the fight breaks out. A few of the Immortal’s henchmen and a demon or a vampire seem to be in a scuffle. Buffy curses her height as she struggles to see across the room if she should intervene.

But the Immortal reassures her. “This is my business tonight, cara mia. The boys have a capo to help out. Don’t worry your pretty little head over it. Let’s dance some more.”

“No. let’s get some fresh air.” She grabs his lapels and pulls him to the back door without breaking eye contact. Pushes open the door with her back and pulls him into the street behind the club. Then quickly presses into him against the wall to make way for another red convertible being driven too fast. They must come out in the Spring.

She takes the opportunity of being pressed against him on the wall to kiss. He deepens it just when she desires and they hold tight to each other against the wall.

After a minute she decides this is still too public and pulls him across the street behind the Mateo boutique. Sometimes it seems like there’s a Mateo on every street corner in this neighborhood but this one has a nice private alleyway just where she needs it.

His timing is always perfect and as soon as she slides her black panties down and kicks them across the alley his hands are lifting her hips against the stone wall. No need to slide up her dress when it’s cut this short. No need for patience when she already feels this wet.

Alley sex. Fifteen minute break behind the Doublemeat to feel like a real person — like a real girl. She never had a relationship with Spike, but they did this enough times. Or not nearly enough times.

Buffy shuts her eyes and imagines blue eyes looking into hers. Rotates her hips and squeezes to make him touch her in just that spot where — ahhh. She knows this is the last time.

The Immortal is just a toy she’s keeping to remind her of the man she loved. The rebound guy who fucks just as well as he did even if he does lack the passion to make love seem a little like rage.

Filling her up right now and she imagines platinum bed head curls and that tongue curl behind his teeth and heats up inside starting beneath her womb. The warmth goes down her legs and she tightens them where they are wrapped around his waist. The warmth rises up inside her lungs and she holds him closer. Through her neck and her throat and her mouth and she shouts out a gasp.


Shit. She shouldn’t have said that out loud.

The special warmth fades quickly.

“Uh — spike me again! Spike me with your sexy spike. Don’t you just love our colorful english slang?” The Immortal looks a little confused but not suspicious. If you have to call out an ex’s name, always choose one with obvious phallic connotations.

Buffy looks into his brown eyes and slides her legs back down to the ground awkwardly.

That was the last time for them even if he doesn’t know it yet. Now she has had her Spike surrogate and her rebound guy and now she is completely over her old lover. That’s what she is telling herself tonight, anyway.

She hurries out of the alley ahead of the Immortal and sees a black limousine that looks familiar. Before she can connect it with the parking garage at the evil law firm an hour ago it pulls away and she can see the front of the club again.

“Oh my god! They stole my vespa!”


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